Why people stay in abusive relationships?

Abusive Relationships

People who have never been abused often wonder why a person can’t leave an abusive relationship. There are many reasons why people stay in abusive relationships.

·          Fear: They are afraid of what will happen if they decide to leave the relationship. Their partner has threatened them and they do not feel safe leaving.

·          Believing Abuse is Normal: Their idea of a healthy relationship is messed up and they don’t recognize that abuse is not normal and is unhealthy.

·          Embarrassment: It’s hard for them to admit to abuse and they feel they have done something wrong. Also the fear of being judged by family & friends makes them stay on.

·          Low Self-esteem: Being constantly put down and devalued makes them think that abuse is their fault.

·           Love:  They feel the abuser will change because there is love involved in the relationship.

·          Social/Peer Pressure: If the abuser is popular, it can be hard for a person to tell their friends for fear that no one will believe them or that everyone will take the abuser’s side.

·          Cultural/Religious Reasons: Traditional gender roles, moral and social conditioning can make it difficult for women to admit to being abused. The religious upbringing may hinder their efforts and they may stay for fear of bringing shame to the family. Pregnancy/Parenting: They may feel pressurized to raise their children with both parents together, even if that means staying in an abusive relationship. Also, the abusive partner may threaten to take or harm the children if the abused leaves.

·          Lack of Money: Financial dependence on the abuser is a big deterrent for them to leave.

·          Nowhere to Go:  No place to go, even if they decide to leave an abusive relationship, can dampen their spirit and force them to stay on.